Psalm 116:7

"Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the LORD has been good to you."

It is midnight here. All is quiet except for the buzzing of the enormous fly who sneaked into my house. Friday began a new chapter of life for me. One not filled with children and endless hours of work to do every evening and weekend - one far away from anything and anyone that I know. But I find myself strangely at peace; certain that this is the peace that surpasses all understanding. This just feels normal to me at this point. Though I'm sure as the week progresses, there will be moments of screaming at myself, "What have you done!?"

God has been good to me.

Even if this job had not come through. Even if I were still stuck in Iowa doing a job that didn't fit me well. Even if I had not gotten to see so many of my friends on the way out here. Even if I had nothing at all...I could still say that God has been good to me.

Tonight finds me reflecting on how God has been good to me. A few years back, God shook me to my very foundations and reminded me of what He did for me 2000 years ago. He taught me about grace and what it means to make grace my reality. I have screwed up. I have not been faithful. I have fallen short on countless turns. I have not trusted. I have cried out in bitterness. I have been downright ugly. And yet, God has chosen to love me in the midst of all of that. I'm floored. I know how undeserving I am of the "good things" that come my way...but most of all, I think I realize more and more with each passing day and each hideous sin how unworthy I am of His grace. And sometimes I want to push Him away and tell Him that it is too ugly...but He speaks His love to me and my desire for that Love wins out.

God has been good to me.

Thank You for this peace.